Do you find yourself waiting on an apology? Thinking to yourself “if they would just apologize” you could move forward? Happiness & peace could finally be restored! But no, not really! Anticipating Apologies that may or may not ever come keep us stuck!
That’s right, I said it. Approximately a year ago there was an encounter that I’d witnessed between two people and one of them absolutely needed an apology, but it didn’t happen. Crazy, right?! It changed the entire dynamic of the relationship rendering it completely stuck.
Curiously though I find that this is occurs more often than not. Relationships, partnerships, growth, movements, etc- they ALL can be stopped because someone is waiting on an apology.
But why? Why exactly IS it that we wait on apologies rather than letting it go? Just when exactly IS it best to let things go and create our own closure?
Many times we are deluding ourselves into thinking that “everything” will be alright if we just get the apology, but that’s not the case. Apologies without action are just words without fulfillment of the implied promise. My suggestion is to consider the value of the friendship and consider the bigger picture. Often times when we shift our focus to a wider or more broad perspective we are able to see that this moment is just that, a moment. Is this one singular moment more powerful than the big picture or the hundreds of other moments prior to this? Most likely not.
It’s up to you to decide when an apology is necessary while at the same time taking ownership of how you respond. You have lots of choices in how you respond but it’s completely up to you to learn why your action is the way it is. The other person/party is outside of your hula hoop of things you can control- therefore, the only thing you can do anything about is yourself.
Let’s reevaluate what exactly is holding us back so that we can keep moving forward. With practice, it becomes much easier. Waiting for an apology is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to feel hurt. It does not work that way.
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